I don’t have vast experience of global pandemics. However, I must say that I was utterly stumped for the first six weeks of this particular one. Why oh why couldn’t I paint? Why did I have no desire to pick up a brush? I had just returned from a gorgeous island armed with photos and sketchbooks full of inspiration and yet I couldn’t shake the “meh” feeling inside. Only as the lockdown situation began to lift, did I discover I was not the only one to lose my artistic mojo. It is a thing you see. It is as magical and illusive as a kelpie and if you have it, then every part of you feels alive. Without it, you feel a bit joyless and strange. Or at least I did.
Years ago I struggled with the notion of painting en plein air. Bracing myself against the elements seemed like no fun at all. However, I have come to realise that painting in the studio comes in partnership with this time outdoors. Painting with a fresh memory of the coast, the sound of whooshing water still whispering in my ears, seems to breathe life into my work.
The sun between the showers
With lockdown lifting, I decided to get some use out of the tent I bought many years ago. Heading for the north west coast of Scotland, I camped and explored the lochs and beaches all the way up to Durness. Taking in well recommended spots such as Achmelvich and Scourie, the colours started to brighten from the atmospheric greys of the mountains and lochs. Pay off for the midgie bites I accrued.
In the short moments of painting, I am rarely delighted with the studies I create. It is only much later when I look back at them, that I feel a fondness for them. They help me to remember the sounds and the smells, the colours and the utter joyous feeling of freedom. I’m not one for buzz words, but mindful might be the right one. It’s an immersive thing, art. Or at least it can be. Maybe that is the reason I value the art of others so much. It’s the equivalent of listening to music or watching a show. It transports you. It lifts you.
Only jellyfish for company- the perfect spot to isolate.
At a time when health is reported on the news daily, I can’t help but think about our mental health. If we have a disease then there is a care plan for it. If our minds feel droopy and our mojo has abandoned us, what can we do? How can we treat this? The first thing that comes to my mind is compassion. Be kind to yourself. We have become a people of criticism and judgement. It serves many of us well in various aspects of our lives. However it means we rarely give ourselves a break. If you feel crummy, know that it won’t last forever. Really, it won’t. The little things that make you smile, they are enough to tide you over until something more exciting happens.
And breathe.